R E S P E C T - find out what it means to me
July 15, 2007 by Diva Jood
Bill Wilson and Ebby Thatcher
Alcoholics Anonymous has been called “the most significant phenomenon in the history of ideas in the twentieth century.” (from the introduction, The Spirituality of Imperfection by Ernest Kurtz and Katherine Ketcham)
On a chill, rainy afternoon in November 1934, two men sat catercorner at the kitchen table of a brownstone house in Brooklyn, New York. On the white oil-cloth covered table stood a pitcher of pineapple juice, two glasses, and a bottle of gin recently retrieved from its hiding place in the overhead tank of the toilet in the adjacent bathroom.
The visitor, neatly groomed and bright-eyed, smiled gently as his tall, craggy-faced host reached for the bottle and offered him a drink.
No, thanks,” Ebby said. “I’m not drinking.”
“Not drinking! Why not?” Bill was so surprised that he stopped pouring to look with concern at his old friend. “What’s the matter?”
I don’t need it anymore,” Ebby replied simply. “I’ve got religion.”
Religion? Damn! For a fleeting moment, Bill wondered about his friend’s sanity. Ebby, after all, was a drinking buddy from way back. Now, apparently, he had gone off the deep end - his alcoholic insanity had become religious insanity!
Bill gulped a slug of gin. Well, dammit, not him. Religion was for the weak, the old, the hopeless; he’d never “get religion.
“Spirituality of Imperfection”
Ebby Thatcher died thirty years later, destitute, drunk. He remained a periodic alcoholic. Bill Wilson never did “get religion.” But he became sober, and, in June of 1935, with Dr. Robert Smith, founded Alcoholics Anonymous. Bill realized that to remain sober, “we must find some spiritual basis for living, else we die.” Bill knew at his core that religion with its rules, pronouncements, and commandments would not work for him, nor would it keep him sober. He also knew that without help from a power greater than himself, he would be unable to keep himself sober by his will power alone. And here is the great paradox of AA.
Alcoholics Anonymous works because of a process of identification, through the telling of personal stories and experiences. Although AA insists on the spiritual for recovery, it is not religious. Bill Wilson once said that the problem with organized religions “is their claim how confoundedly right all of them are.” And what makes Alcoholics Anonymous the most successful program of recovery for alcoholics is that the spirituality found in AA is more concerned with questions, with imperfection, than with rigid answers. The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking.
I’ve twice participated in The Blogswarm Against Theocracy, because I am appalled at the rigidity of theocracy in any guise. And I’ve come to a conclusion: militant atheism is as rigid as the religious right. Intolerance is intolerance under any guise.
Alcoholics Anonymous is based on the acceptance of human limitations and powerlessness. It grows out of testing ideas not on the basis of some dogma or “revelation,” but against the realities of everyday living. Through shared experiences, through the realities of daily living, a spirituality of the mundane evolved. It works, it really does. And membership in AA includes devoutly religious people, atheists, agnostics - the umbrella is huge. There are no rules. Perhaps it is a case of the inmates running the asylum, but it works.
But here’s the deal: our nation has been overrun with hatred that has grown out of fanatical religious belief. We are reviled by people who have fanatical religious belief. And those of us who have a spiritual path are lumped into the pot by atheists who are as fanatical in their hatred as the religious right. When did atheism get all the answers?
Here’s what I know. I know that I used to drink when I didn’t want to, and now I don’t drink even when I DO want to. If I don’t drink over the next few days, on Wednesday, July 18th, I will be clean and sober for 19 years. One of my dearest friends died on July 10th with 25 1/2 years of graceful sobriety and faith that God’s plan for her was solid. She had the spirituality of imperfection in her soul. We are imperfect beings in an imperfect world, and the best I can do on any given day is to try to be tolerant of your quirks and foibles, because god knows I have plenty myself.
So here’s the deal: your belief is yours and I respect you for it. If that belief is that there is no god, that’s fine - it’s your decision. If you believe that there is a god, that’s fine too. It is your decision. Don’t tell me how, or what to believe. Don’t call me stupid, or an idiot, or a sheeple, for having a belief in god. Hatred does not solve problems, intolerance in any cloth does not solve problems. Name calling does not solve problems. Intolerance is a form of fear, and fear is the fertilizer for ignorance. Let’s put an end to fear, intolerance and hatred, and let it begin with me.
Namaste.
(cross posted at Journeys with Jood)
Sphere: Related Content
Atheists are great folks. I do not lump them in with extremists in general and no one should. Are you doing that with this DivaJood:
“And those of us who have a spiritual path are lumped into the pot by atheists who are as fanatical in their hatred as the religious right. When did atheism get all the answers?”
You seem to be taking shots at them in this post, which won’t enlighten or engage anyone imho. Your putting them on the defensive right off the bat.
But thats my opinion, and I could be wrong…
Dusty, I’m pretty sure we’re having a semantical misunderstanding - provoked by my leaving out the word “militant” before atheists in the phrase you quote. Atheism is not bad - that’s not what I meant to imply, and if I did, I apologize. I was referring to those militant atheists who have become as extreme as the religious right of any religion. When any of us (including myself) lump everyone into a big pot, we’re making a huge mistake.
So let me clarify: when extreme factions of any belief system attack others who don’t fall into their belief system, the others are put on the defensive. Intolerance of any stripe is bad.
Dusty, you were right to point out lazy language in my post, and I apologize for offending you (or anyone else.) Atheists are NOT bad people. Neither are Christians, Jews, Muslims, Hindus, or Pagans. My intent was to talk about extremists of any stripe.
Thanks.
No problemo. We ALL need to be tolerant of those who hold the same goals as the group..here group means progressives..so that we can attain our goal of changing the way our country is run and by who.
The progressive agenda has many factions. They don’t always get along. This is to our detriment many times. We don’t walk lockstep with each other like the neocon right does.
But I like that
as a friend of bill w., you did a great job explaining the genesis of AA and it’s take on spirituality. i had a friend who was having a very hard time envisioning a higher power - until she finally found hers through connecting with dolfins - she couldn’t find anything more beautiful, loving or graceful with all their obvious power. anything can do it for you.
I’ll comment as an atheist. I didn’t used to be one. As a 3 year old my mother embraced a religion that is reviled and misunderstood by most of the world. I’ll just allude to the fact that it wasn’t Mormonism. I was an only child and did what was expected of me.
I naturally believed and can truthfully say I lived the life that was spoken from the podium and the examples set forth from the Bible. I was a virgin when I married. But I saw hypocrisy in people…pointing fingers at others when they should have looked in the mirror. concerned with others’ business…and I knew this was wrong. Being an honest person…it twisted something inside me that I just couldn’t shake off.
I was out of it in my early 20’s and haven’t looked back. I don’t see things as being explained that God works in mysterious ways…or that it is the Lord’s will. I can’t explain it…but I lost faith. I find too much wrong in this world and with people to have a faith anymore. I believe in…to thine own self be true…and I don’t me that in a selfish way. I mean to live my life the best way I can and not hurt anyone…and follow the laws of the land.
But, because I was involved in a controversial religion at one point in my life I understand what it is to stand out for one’s beliefs…be different…be reviled. I grew up without holidays, birthdays, not saluting the flag…and it isn’t easy being the only student in the stadium that didn’t stand for the national anthem. I’m sure you can guess by now what I was…I don’t like to say it. I haven’t been forgiven by my mother for leaving it either. But, no matter.
Diva…I understood where you were coming from exactly…and you are right. Plenty of my writing about the right is biased about mixing their religion with our politics. I greatly applaud the separation of church and state. I don’t care if people have a faith and I don’t…I can still be their friend. I wouldn’t vote for an atheist for president if that person didn’t have decent policies to recommend and run on. I do think religion shouldn’t be on the political table at all. I don’t need to know that someone has or doesn’t have a faith. Religion doesn’t come into play in England ever so I’m told. I wish it were the same here. That is a private subject…as far as I’m concerned. But I do admit that the administration has taken their religiosity waaaay too far for comfort…one aspect being the Supreme Court. That is a travesty of Justice x infinity.
An aside…your articles of sobriety and talking about AA is always good…you never know when your words will reach out and help someone. You are honest and set a fine example for others. That was a fine piece you did…even though I spoke more of the atheism.
Diva, my Diva!!!! Brava, sisah!!!! That was a lovely article and expressed the “soul” of AA eloquently. Happy AA “Birthday”! One day at a time, babe! You know, when I first got sober in ‘88, I was lucky (blessed) in so many ways. 1st, a crusty ol’ pagan Voodoin took me to my first meeting. That was a pretty important thing for me; beyond mere coincidence, I’d have to say. Back then when I heard “God” I was likely to spit or run the other way. It was a good thing that a spelI castin’ drum playin’ magic man introduced me to AA. I was lucky too, that I stuck around long enough to find out that “God” was one of my own understanding, and wasn’t required to have even the slightest resemblance to the christian god. I remember one old guy who used to say:
My best friend was an agnostic and for her, AA, the group; the collective consciousness; whatever you wanna call it– was her Higher Power. *cackle* I remember (we all know there are fundies everywhere) some old time sober christians used to laugh and say that I’d “grow out” of being a witch!
*sigh* You know, the really amazing thing about AA are the 12 Traditions. Forgive me, Diva. I’m not trying to hijack your post, but considering how long AA has operated without the crap that goes on in most organizations/governments, I’ve always thought it would be excellent if we could adapt them for government!! LOL. Anyway, “Keep comin’ back”, as we say, and thanks for the great article!
“ah there’s magic a foot”..too much kissemet,to much magic in my life to say no god,but I can hang with anybody~except for uptight “I am right and your not” folks.I have used the substitue the word of your choice option more times than I can count..it works well for me.To my mind *if* there is indeed “That Which Cannot Be Named”, the path is construced wide enough,with enough sideways,by ways and re-routes that we all will get there! Throw water balloons at any one who tries to convert you to “the right way”..Thanks Diva
Dusty, oh, shiny new color for the template, it’s GORgeous. I love dark blue, it makes me think of late summer in Paris. Don’t ask why. I don’t know. But re: progressives disagreeing amongst our ranks - that is one thing the conservatives seem to have none of. They get into lock-step, and that scares me. I love discussions, I love animated discourse, where people of differing opinions talk to each other and reason out, learn and grow. That is progress!
Sumo, one of my dear friends in Australia, Mike, is a member of that controversial religion you experienced. He’s an amazing guide, loves being out bush and loves wildlife. He doesn’t celebrate any holidays, no birthdays, same drill - AND he believes that humans have been on earth for only about 6,000 years. He also believes that the moon landings were filmed here in Hollywood! But I love going camping with him, and we agree to disagree on the rest of it. I wish I could send ALL my Australia clients out with him, but he’s expensive.
Louise, my favorite was what my friend Lonna did: she made her bedspread her higher power. And then she prayed to her bedspread for someone to love, and a stray dog showed up at her door. That was one hell of a bedspread.
Thorne, are you class of ‘88 too? You go girl! We must know the same old guy… And yes, I have long thought that the Government would benefit from our Twelve Traditions. Especially the part that refers to Rule 62.
Sage, I have found that the only “right way” is my formula for picking horses at the track. If I like the name of the horse, I bet. Mostly I lose, so much for “right way.” The point, as always, is that one’s spiritual path is personal, and there is no “right” or “true” path.
Dusty, thanks for fixing the “more” button.
great post Diva , you explained something I have wondered about for a long time, and I always wanted to learn more about this….and yes, there is no Right or Wrong path…I just always hope and pray that folks just find their way to the Path…and try to give them a little light on the way….namaste.
( People always ask why I say “namaste”..because it means” I am with you in spirit along the journey”….and that also means you are accompanying people in the good and the bad times…it implies empathy and even hope…that no one is ever alone on their journey)
Enigma, that’s true - we are never alone. We meet fellow travelers, and we connect at a variety of levels. Namaste.
Nice one Enigma!
This was a lovely post, Jood. Spirituality requires receptivity, and militantism/fanaticism can’t operate under those paramenters. Regardless of your chosen path, what’s important is that you walk it honestly.
I also bet horses based on their names. I once won on a horse called The Bag Lady. She came it 36:1.
Jet, thank you. I agree, militant or fanatical thinking cannot operate under anything that questions.
I love the long shot - The Bag Lady - anyway, is there any other way to bet?
BILL WILSON - FALSE PROPHET
It is important to note that Bill Wilson’s faith system was not based on Jesus Christ and Him crucified; nor is there any mention of Jesus Christ being the Savior from his sin. Both he and Bob Smith (co-founder of AA) embraced and promoted a variety of spiritual experiences, which included practicing spiritualism and conversing with the dead (which the Bible forbids) and being heavily involved in séances. Wilson also acted as a medium or channeler. It was while involved in these types of religious experiences, not Biblical Christianity, that Wilson developed his Twelve Steps (Pass It On, pp 156, 198, 275, 278).
PEACE BE WITH YOU
MICKY
wow…
Oh, Mickey, we still have a disagreement. BTW, how’s drinking working for ya?
LMFAO!!! Now that’s a good one!!! I have heard alot of christianists try to claim that the program comes from the bible, (via the oxford group), and have often argued that the tenets upon which the program is built; although found in many religions, cannot be ascribed to any single source. Dear Bill and Dr. Bob were all about teaching folks how to create the kind of spiritual experience/awakening* necessary to bring about a change in consciousness that manifests in an individual’s thoughts and actions. They were smart enough to know that attaching their concepts to any one religion, would only alienate many drunks that really needed the program.
That anyone would spend time to try to prove them “false prophets” is hilarious (but great cannon fodder for my arguments!! LOL), as well as indicative of the typical bullshit of chrisionists and dominionists. Proof yet again that these folks aren’t about love and compassion. FSM forbid that anyone should find her life and heart saved by anything outside of Jay-zus!
(*expression coigned by Dr. Carl Jung when describing a fundamental change in perception/thinking, usually brought about by a life-changing event or “moment of clarity”)
Thorne, I visited Mickey’s blog - he’s a runaway from AA, and determined that AA doesn’t work. I guess drinking does work for him, eh? Sort of like my sponsee who fired me this week because she is convinced that she doesn’t need a sponsor, or direction, or suggestions. “Alcoholism isn’t that bad in my family”, she told me. “My brother died from it, but it isn’t that bad.”
Uh-huh.
Oh. BTW, Diva… I forgot I didn’t know you back when I celebrated my 19 years on Feb 22! Yeah… class of ‘88! LOL
Thats what I meant Diva~many paths ,many ways to a spiritual “end” and who’s to say what works for me is right for anyone else~all have their paths.My severely dis~abled son was born in ‘88~that illustrates nicely that many types of “class’s” started that year.He was born on the 9th~~ah that sort of “connection” gives me the chills..and hope.
Oh, Sage, that’s amazing - yes, many different connections!
Thorne, we’ll celebrate!