Life is such a friggin crapshoot.
November 17, 2007 by Dusty
Rod Stewart..Reason to believe.
Peter Gabriel says it well for moi…In Your Eyes..
I wish to regale you with lovely visions of my wasted life. Its not really wasted, but hell, it ain’t that great either..just in case your feeling sorry for yourself.I have a friend that is dying of cancer..a wonderful, vibrant, compassionate man that doesn’t deserve this. Bush and Cheney deserve this..wtf..why aren’t they suffering like Jeff is? He has no health insurance to top this off. Ain’t that great? Doesn’t it just scream “Its great to be an American citizen?”
No mutha fuckas it doesnt and I know that. That we, the universal we, make our citizens beg for medical help is so bullshit beyond reason…I can’t even go there right now. I am mad and god help me..I take his/her name in vane every chance I get. I cant’ even type this without crying..balling my ever lovin eyes out..this is SO unfair. ITs so FUCKED UP. If he had insurance would they have caught it in time? Only God in her glory knows..because I fucking don’t.
This beautiful man has less than 8 months on this earth.. and I can’t think about it without wailing and gnashing of teeth..
Next up..my mother..the woman that gave me life is coming to SoCal for her usual winter visit. This is a woman that God herself would smite if she had the time..believe me dear reader. I wil say no more on this subject. ok?
My only child..is an…asshole. A total self-serving, self-fucking-absorbed asshole. It makes me sad beyond belief that I raised a human that is this fucked up. I don’t know where I went off base at…I don’t have a fucking clue wtf I did wrong..believe me when I say this..I thought I did a decent job as a single parent. Evidently I have been delusional all these friggin years.. All I can say at this point in time is this..If your ass goes to jail you fucking deserve it you brash bag of shit. I have sunk enough money into the “What about me fund’ to last me a lifetime.
And to my husband..a wonderful man that puts up with my ridiculous ass..I love you but fuck the hell off sweet pea. Do not even try to go ‘toe to toe’ with me on grave issues of importance to our country. Your gonna lose and it will piss you off. You might be a republican that has seen the light, but mutha fucka..you ain’t there yet..so don’t even get on your high-fucking-horse and try to tell me I have a problem with ‘Bush”..the man has his own set of problems and he is causing more harm than anyone ever thought possible. I love you, but shut the fuck up..do not try to talk politics with me..I will get the handgun and blow your fucking republican ass to kingdom come..I swear I will. So, don’t put me in a position that I have to choose between being right and putting a bullet between your eyes just to shut you the fuck up.
Last but not least..to those sumbitches at the workers compensation insurance board..how you bags of shit sleep at night after fucking people out of coverage is beyond me. I did the job of 4 fucking people for over 8 months and the thanks I get is: “fuck you lady..its a pre-existing condition”..It was fine until my shitbag company figured they could save money by making me do the job of 4 people..and you want to bitch about the outcome? Your a real piece of work..and I hope to GOD when you die, the devil laughs in your fucking face when you have the balls to ask why your there. The bottom line of the corporation is not a good enough reason to screw people out of healthcare that will make their lives livable you bags of batshit. I can’t even make dinner now without horrible, debilitating pain..thanks a lot, much less just make it through a day without wishing I was fucking dead.
As for the rest of you..that actually were bored enough to read this bullshit..thank you. Thanks for taking the time to read my whining bs. It means a lot, I swear.
I do this crap once a blue moon…and we know those suckers don’t come around often my dear reader.
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trust me when i say- ‘i understand.’ watching someone you love die without trying everything humanly possible to save them- is beyond words. to not be able to try everything humanly possible because 1) no insurance and 2) every drug on the market has something wrong with it and is recalled- is also beyond words. i would have paid ten times over for the medication that would have helped my mom live longer- i don’t know that she’ll make it to her 66th birthday. why? she has a weak heart and lungs from emphysema and high cholesterol. you may ask why she isn’t taking all sorts of pills- to which i would say- she tried. every- and i exaggerate not- every med she was put on and paid for was recalled and pulled from the market. the only thing she will take now- aspirin. and she is waiting for them to tinker with that. so- my wonderful mum- the one i plot strategy with and talk politics and research with- won’t be here to grow old either. why? greed. pure and simple. i heart ya sista.
It must be in the air:my Best Friend’s Mother has breast cancer,her sister may have ovarian cancer~waiting for the results on that~,one brother lives 400 miles away,one brother can not get up off the couch,a sister is moving away,her child is a self centered idiot(my friend was a great Mom),with two kids under 3,wants to marry her new boyfriend of 3 weeks~who possibly is a gay man,who has not recognized or admitted to himself…her work sucks,her boss is a mean person….she showed up on my door step at 2 am,I listened till 4 am…Mr. Sage says “I don’t care” to everything…well we are nothing if we are not tough old bitches,eh? I love you Dusty~hang in there for me and I’ll do the same sister.
At least you are not alone in this world. There are people getting the same shaft too. I understand your disappointment and wish I could change it for you.