Chimpletons, Your Monkey ADMITS That He LIES

Now you Chimpletons have parroted your monkey’s insistences that we were just doing wonderfully in Iraq all along. You ignored the mountains of evidence to the contrary, preferring to take the word of a man who has never done a thing in his life that could be considered on the up-and-up.Guess what? Your monkey is a LIAR. He admits it (albeit in a sideways manner) himself right here. Let’s see what he says.

Bush conceded earlier that before the surge began last year, he was pessimistic about the way the war in Iraq was going.

“How worried were you?” Raddatz asked.

“I was worried. Look, I’m worried any time it looks like we’re going to fail in Iraq,” Bush said.

During that time in 2006, when many were saying Iraq was in a full-blown civil war, Bush kept his rhetoric upbeat, saying in speeches that We’re winning” and “We have a plan for victory.”

Raddatz asked the president about that, and the president insisted he did it to keep up troop morale.

“That’s as much to try and bolster the spirits of the people in the field as well - you can’t have the commander in chief say to a bunch of kids who are sacrificing that either it’s not worth it or you’re losing. What does that do for morale?” Bush said.

Isn’t that touching. The monkey did it for the morale of the soldiers. That must also be why he continuously LIES about things like troop redeployments and the amount of time soldiers will spend on those deployments. Yeah, I know how much of a morale-booster it has to be for someone in the desert to find out that he or she is going to spend even more time in Iraq, courtesy of the monkey. And just imagine what a THRILL it must be for people now facing their fifth rotation into the place! Sure, back in 2003 Chimpy basically said it’d all be wrapped up in no time-but we know why he did it now.

Most GIs figured out that Chimpy was lying some time ago, which accounts for the popularity of Barack Obama among them. And in all reality, a quick look at things like the divorce and suicide rates among GIs is a pretty good indicator that Chimpy’s policy of lying isn’t doing anything but gutting the morale of the soldiers. One might go so far as to say that soldiers are completely disillusioned with the lying monkey now and despair of him ever telling them the TRUTH about anything. In that regard, at least, they’re on the same page with most of the rest of the world.

Chimpletons, please tell me this. When do we know the monkey is telling the truth, and when is he just spouting shit for that all-important morale? I’d love to hear the answer to this riddle.