Dinner With Two Marines

Tonight, I went to my regular sushi restaurant in Redondo Beach.  Two gentlemen were seated at the sushi bar to my left, and as we were all finishing up, we started chatting - they mentioned they were from out of town, in for a Communications Conference.  I asked who they worked for, and they said they were both Lt. Cols. in the Marines.  They were in town to learn effective ways of communicating, and they said that sometimes you say more by what you DON’T say, then by what you do say.

 And they said that a person should never, ever say “no comment” in answer to a question.  The response should be “I don’t know the answer to that, but I will find out and get back to you.”  Transparency is better than obfuscation, according to two Marines who’ve been in the service for 20 years.

 The one, a lovely fellow from the deep South, said he’d served three tours in Iraq because he’d been a victim of Stop-Loss.  The other explained Stop-Loss in the most dimplomatic terms - but the gist of it was that it is the way the Military prevents people from going back to their lives.  They both said that it is used when ranks are “thin.”  The other thing the Military does is Stop-Move, which is this:  a normal tour of duty is 3 years in a location, then the soldier is moved.  Stop-Move keeps them in the same location, again, when ranks are “thin.”  Without saying it, but with body language and innuendo, these gentlemen made it clear they disapproved of Stop-Loss and Stop-Move. They drew a parallel with ineffective CEOs who cannot manage their staffs.

These men were career military, and they were both interesting and terrific conversationalists. They were funny, and fair, and aware. They also recognized right away that I am opposed to the war. The one said that the people in Iraq don’t want us there, but they do understand why we are there. And they both indicated that they felt we should not have gone in the first place; but now there, we’ve entered a quagmire that they can’t see a way out of.

So what do I make of this? I am not anti-military. I am opposed to illegal wars, but I found myself thanking them both for their service. I see real patriotism at work when people can have a conversation about hot topics without fear of reprisal or being bullied. It was a delight to speak freely with these gentlemen.