the girl who cried misogyny

yeah. it’s usually better that i don’t write when i am exhausted because my normally short irritation fuse gets even shorter. i don’t even know how to start because i just have so very much actual anger at americans for being so incredibly stupid- and then at my own gender for being even stupider. i can hardly stand it. i have never given it a second thought- in my entire life- that i am a white woman. it doesn’t occur to me to care- because i have never had to. that doesn’t mean that i can’t be an ally with and empathize with- women of color or simply any other person who doesn’t look like me. i have always backed the under dog and i have always stood up for what i felt was right- i get that from both parents- although i don’t really have a relationship with my father-

i do see parts of him in me. anway- that’s not where i am headed- so onward. i am beyond sick of white women in america. beyond sick. perhaps because i see so very many of them because of who i am. that doesn’t mean i can ever know what it’s like to be a person of color- but i do know class differential- and it irritates the hell right out of me. white women have a sense of entitlement that i cannot even begin to describe. it doesn’t occur to us that we shouldn’t have our white suburban life with our white suburban children driving in our white bread suvs to our white bread generic chain outlets. it is our right and our destiny- it is our american dream. it doesn’t occur to us that we exclude so very many people out of our lives- not because we are mean- but because we don’t like to be challenged. we are cinderella and snow white and we have our fairy tale weddings and dream jobs and 2.4 children and a dog- and we are entitled because this is our america.

so- what does this have to do with the price of wheat in china? oh- everything. this sense of entitlement is destroying america and destroying any chance at salvaging any democracy we may have left- yep. talking about those feminists again. those goddamned feminists in goddamned america. being a human being- i kind of like the idea of equality. yep. sure do. that’s why i don’t like the feminist movement. no- i didn’t misspeak. feminists aren’t about equality for women anymore- they are about white women’s rights. let’s lay it out there. i have read many, many blogs written by lesbian, bi and trans women, and women who are not white- and i hear a common refrain- ‘oh, they let us in the door but we have to know our place- which is seen and not heard.’ it’s like a perverse affirmative action. let’s invite a few odd balls to our tea party but if they get out of line- show them the door. what i have read on white feminists blogs- vote hillary clinton or you are a misogynist. don’t you know that misogyny is much more prevalent than racism in this country? now, i am not saying there isn’t misogyny out there- and i admittedly don’t watch the male talking heads on tv- or read the big name blogs- but i can say that the circle i read- not one obama supporter has brought gender up when criticizing hillary clinton. not one. but the clintonistas- to a woman and man- all play the talking points from the campaign like the rethugs do after getting their daily play by play from the rnc.

anyhoo- the lather i got into was after reading josh’s article at talking points memo regarding exit polls:

“But I see no reasonable argument that white women are more resistant to voting for a black man than white men. So in this case, I think we can reasonably infer from the poll numbers what common sense would likely tell us is obvious: that a big factor in this contest is women voting for Hillary because of her gender — whether in the sense of identifying with her and her take on key issues or because of the historic nature of her candidacy.

This doesn’t rule out racial voting — but it does narrow the potential scope of it. And, as I alluded in the title of the post, it’s one of these facts that has the virtue, in addition to being true, of casting the whole process in a much less toxic, divisive light.” (emphasis mine)

no, no, no josh- it is just as toxic and just as divisive an issue as white versus black and red states versus blue. it is reverse misogyny. i don’t know if there’s a technical term for that. if we want to be seen as the equal gender- we have to demand it for sure, but desperately voting for the first woman candidate because you think that another chance is far away is the most pathetic thing i think i have ever heard in my life. if you think a woman should be able to be a candidate- then go the code pink route and become involved in places that matter- local elections, state elections, congressional elections. that is where candidates are culled from. you want to see more women- support more women- run yourself. don’t just throw good money after bad because clinton has boobs. please. wanting a woman president so badly that it blinds you to the reality of the candidacy is crazy. excluding women who don’t look like you from the process because of your own sense of entitlement and blindness to the fact that you look at the world through white eyes is a very elizabeth hasslebitch thing to do. and voting based solely on gender is the antithesis of what feminism started out as. you may as well vote mccan’t.

i won’t link to the white feminist bloggers i read- for 2 reasons: 1) i don’t want to give them the hits and 2) i purged them from my google reader never to return. no- it ain’t harsh. groupthink is never a good thing especially when joined with bigotry and hypocrisy.

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