FATHER’S DAY

PraetorOne is having his very own  first Fathers Day today.~Dusty
By PraetorOne

The recent death of Tim Russert in conjunction with Fathers Day has me thinking about the relationship that I share with my own father.  My father and I did not always have the best of relationships.  I was fathered when my dad was in his mid teens and I lived with my mother who slept around, went homeless twice, and dated a man who molested me on a regular basis.  Through all of this my mother blamed my father for our circumstances.  So when I went to look for my father at the age of 17 it was with a sense of hate and vengeance.  At no time did it dawn on me that my mother had lied,which is bizarre because she had lied about so much and on such a regular basis that I never should have trusted her about anything.

The day we met my father and I got into a knock down, drag out fight which required my stepmother and several neighbors to break up.  I guess you might say that I was an angry  kid  with  a  huge  chip  on my shoulder.   Luckily   there were  several people  on the scene who  knew  my  father  well  and who  were  willing  to intervene.  My father’s uncle-in-law took me aside and explained that my father  frequently became depressed because I was not a part of his life.  My step mother had to explain how much he loved me.  My dad’s best friend explained that my father had spent the past several years missing me and blaming himself for what had gone wrong.

Somewhere along the line I began to listen and my dad and I began to talk.  Much to my surprise I began to realize that my dad was actually a very kind,gentle, and loving individual.  This was a man who loved animals, who would do anything for anyone, and who forgave easily, always showing a willingness to turn the other cheek. Does that mean my dad is a push over?  Not at all.  But he is a gentle soul who was perfectly willing to take me into his life and offer advice about life in general.   Today my father and I couldn’t be closer.  We hang out together, we share the same political views and we work together on political issues.  I love his warped sense of humor and I seem to be picking it up myself.

More importantly I have learned to love this  man.  He tells  me that there  isn’t  anything  he  wouldn’t  do for  me and  the  feeling is mutual. It took a long time but I learned that this is a man who I can believe, trust, and love.