drama

it will never cease to amaze me how human beings can take pleasure out of hurting other living things- other humans included.  it never ceases to amaze me how humans can become so uncomfortable with other people who aren’t exactly like them.  yesterday was an interesting day for me.  it started out regular enough- a morning cuppa, running some errands, going to the mechanic.  sigh.  took a turn of the strange right there.  i have been going to the same mechanic for years and he knows and likes me and my husband.  but there’s a limit.  i had brakes done so i was there an hour and a half or so and he proceeded to tell me about his recent life experiences and his family and felt very comfortable about it.  i don’t mind.  it’s what i was originally trained for- but unfortunately, i was the one paying for it in a weird twist and reversal   all i could think to tell my husband was- boy.  my mechanic is a vietnam vet very italian and catholic and blue collar rolled into one.  he would give you the shirt off of his back if you asked but has a hard time with his lesbian sister.  sigh.

my sister came home very excited and proud because she actually felt comfortable standing up for herself at work.  my sister has always been self conscious and shy and not very confident.  well, we got started on the buddha ya see   my sister is an odd duck- i love her but she doesn’t fit into mainstream culture.  she’s a lefty and one of those creative types who enjoys theater and karaoke and drawing.  she also loves bright primary colors and elvis- and i told her that there was nothing wrong with that.  well, she also likes to keep her private life private and that’s what she told her nosy interrogators- i mean co-workers.  the ladies who talk about not having sex for years- in the main office of an answering service; the ladies who have 4 different kids by 5 different men- the drama queens who can’t live without a man.  i was proud.

my friend of 20 years or so- the one i speak of who raised her sister’s 3 girls- is now a grandma.  not a cause for celebration.  the baby is healthy but the daughter is not.  oh, she’s fine physically, but she is on a mission to inflict as much hurt onto my friend as she can- for the sole reason that she isn’t her birth mother and she blames her for the birth mother not having  more of an active role in her life.  not my friend’s fault.  her sister moved to another state and that was that.  so, the daughter is married and she and her husband were all set up in a beautiful apartment and my friend helped them set up the nursery and everything.  she had thrown a shower for her daughter (i posted on that and how much i hate those events but i digress) and things were percolating along.  daughter got evicted almost 3 weeks ago and never told anyone.  she just moved in with a friend whose brother was convicted of child molestation and my friend spent 2 1/2 weeks trying to find her 9 mos. pregnant daughter because she feared a lacy peterson scenario.  daughter’s husband has anger issues.  so, finally finds daughter and daughter promises to call when she goes in for labor- and doesn’t.  my friend is crushed.

so, i guess my question is- is this a western culture phenomena?  is it a human trait this need for melodrama and conflict?  why are we such voyeurs into other’s lives?  why do we feel good about hurting other people?  especially the ones who love us?  and what is it about some people that others feel ok to unburden themselves to them?  c’est la vie?

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