the more things change- the more they don’t: part 120

i am a woman. yep. you will have to take my word for it. growing up the way i did- american, christian, strong maternal figure, misogynistic drunk for a paternal figure- absolutely made me who i am today. i also came of age in the reagan era of ‘trickle down’ theories that never seemed to trickle down to us. odd that. jobs were scarce then for my blue collar parents and my mom cleaned houses for the ‘haves’ who, for the most part, were middle class. i helped her so i look back now and see that they were middle class- but at the time, we thought that they were rich. anyhoo, that’s neither here nor there. the point of this post is (yeah, i know you are waiting with bated breath)

women’s rights haven’t continued to move forward (fyi gloria steinham) the are going in reverse in ‘civilized, western countries.’ so, while the feminist movement in this country was busy having their white suburban ‘vote hillary’ coffee klatches- women’s rights have inched back to the medieval times. we have much to say about muslim folks and how horribly they treat women- the whole honor killing or acid in the face thing- or even stoning- for crimes that they didn’t commit. but if you take a peek into the american lifestyle- we are headed that way.

these are three articles i have run across in the past 2 days- and no doubt there are others but you tell me- why is it so very necessary for men to dominate women? it doesn’t make sense to me.

the hymen controversy

‘pro-life’ drugstores market beliefs- they even have a website that i won’t link to- but do google

shaky economic times are shakier for women- always have been

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the girl who cried misogyny

yeah. it’s usually better that i don’t write when i am exhausted because my normally short irritation fuse gets even shorter. i don’t even know how to start because i just have so very much actual anger at americans for being so incredibly stupid- and then at my own gender for being even stupider. i can hardly stand it. i have never given it a second thought- in my entire life- that i am a white woman. it doesn’t occur to me to care- because i have never had to. that doesn’t mean that i can’t be an ally with and empathize with- women of color or simply any other person who doesn’t look like me. i have always backed the under dog and i have always stood up for what i felt was right- i get that from both parents- although i don’t really have a relationship with my father-

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good writing and pleasant suprises

i read belledame and angry black woman regularly- not so much shakesville.  so, i was pleasantly surprised at the post at fetch me my axe that highlighted a letter of solidarity for feminists of all shades from that blog.  i didn’t see any mention of non hetero feminists- and that is a problem.  take a peek yourself- belledame has the links in the post.

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i really don’t know what to say

i have been saying ‘weeping jesus on the cross’ quite a bit- and today was more of an ‘oh my f**king god’ kind of day and there has been a great deal of shaking of my head too. why? you may ask. what’s wrong betmo? that’s where i say- where do i begin? i don’t know if my fingers can type fast enough. i have absolutely almost lost my goddamned mind. deep breath.

i am a woman. i have the boobs and vagina to prove it. trust me. i cannot wrap my mind around how incredibly horribly my gender has represented itself lately. i mean from nancy pelosi to start then on to the spineless, let me join the boys’ club chicks in the congress- to talking heads. omfg!!!! i read a variety of blogs and i believe i have posted before- i read ladies of color and all manners of so-called feminist blogs. i also read plenty of lgbt blogs and blogs by chicks like me- who just want to write. so- i hope i have sufficient information to base my observations. i realize i am rambling- but if i have to read one more time how it’s silda spitzer’s fault- and any woman’s fault- that her husband decided cheat on her- i will punch something. if i have to hear that it’s because she isn’t servicing his needs- i will punch something. if i have to hear one more time- how it’s ok for clinton and ferraro and the entire campaign to be racist and then excuse themselves because they are white women (but not ok for anyone to criticize them because now- that’s misogynist) i think i will punch something.

ladies- why not get the collective heads out of the asses for awhile and get real? ya’ll can’t have it all ways. the clintonistas all claim to be feminists- and yet behave like little victims whenever anyone calls them on anything. the fact is that the feminist movement in this country is alarmingly white. i have heard from more than one source that these little suburban soccer moms who go to the NOW meetings are all willing to include unless you rock their status quo. well, we have seen evidence of that haven’t we? keith olberman misogynst for calling out clinton to repudiate ferraro’s racist statements that she had been all around the news defending? acting like clinton didn’t know and it wasn’t a political ploy. grow up girls- it’s time. get real.

then we have the guilty career women like kern and schlessinger who blame women for being mistreated by men. wtf? my husband and i have a partnership. i imagine most folks do- unless they are rethugs or fundies- or both. i don’t tell my husband what to do and i am fully autonomous. if i don’t want to give it up- guess what? i don’t. hubby doesn’t like it- there’s some vaseline in the bathroom. have at it. get real. these men are adults. it isn’t my ‘duty’ to service my husband- i happen to like him. it isn’t his duty to come home to me every night- he likes me.

the tv personalities aren’t even what makes my blood boil- it’s the minions who are supporting hillary hook, line and sinker and refuse- ala right wing style- to hear anything negative about the clinton campaign. i am not an obama enthusiast. although i don’t know why i continue to make the distinction- it doesn’t matter in the slightest. it will be a cold day in hell before i vote for hillary clinton because of the way she has run her campaign. smart politics- no doubt. but that isn’t what i am looking for in the next president. obama has flaws but he hasn’t played the gender card. he has skewed his mailings and stretched the truth in his ads and debates- but he hasn’t called clinton’s religion into question. get real ladies. you can’t keep playing the misogyny card either. it exists and it is real but you are over playing your hand. keep it going and you may get a ‘snow job special‘.

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spark of controversy

in the interest of disclosure, i am going to go on record as saying- i am a white woman, mid-thirties who has lived predominately in rural and semi-rural settings my entire life. i have never been a part of any organization and, indeed, have more of the go-it-alone sentiment over grouping together. alright, i guess i grew up thinking- if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself. so- with that in mind- i am completely out of my understanding or depth with tackling this topic i am about to throw out there. i am not a person of color and i am not a feminist. consequently, i know next to nothing about either. i guess it’s rather simplistic of me to say i am a humanist- i try to see people as people regardless of race or gender. now, that doesn’t mean i always succeed. societal implants are hard to change when you have lived them for 36 years- but i am trying.

as i have said before, i attempt to learn from folks- and tooling around the blogosphere- i get to learn quite a bit. i really feel that we have to challenge ourselves to think outside of ourselves once in awhile- and if these last 8 years plus haven’t done that- well, you must be a neo con. yes, that was snarky. this particular democratic primary has raised some important topics that we need to be having as a society- and as a planet really. i recently finished national geographic’s february issue- and the article on the ‘black pharaohs‘ got me thinking. the article basically said that in the ancient world, there wasn’t racism per se.

“The ancient world was devoid of racism. At the time of Piye’s historic conquest, the fact that his skin was dark was irrelevant. Artwork from ancient Egypt, Greece, and Rome shows a clear awareness of racial features and skin tone, but there is little evidence that darker skin was seen as a sign of inferiority. Only after the European powers colonized Africa in the 19th century did Western scholars pay attention to the color of the Nubians’ skin, to uncharitable effect.”

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life- as we know it

my blog’s name is life’s journey- and with good reason- i am on a path of learning. some things i learn, i am sure, are no brainers to other folks who perhaps are more enlightened than i. i have been called ‘gullible’ and ‘naive’ on occasion- yes, i know it’s hard to believe sadly, it is true. i am a mid- thirties, middle class white woman- who grew up poor but grew up white. i have lived in rural and semi-rural settings my entire life and i have grown up without much ethnic diversity. sorry folks- white europeans are all pretty much the same in my mind. we had our irish parades and polish parades and we thought that was diversity. so- i am not making excuses- just putting a little background out there. in my high school- i think we had one boy whose parents came from taiwan and perhaps half a dozen african-american kids. that’s it. diversity was measured in how pale a shade of white you were. black folks lived on the east side and everyone else lived in the other three directions.

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